I was talking to a couple of young adults the other night about dancing...one of them was female and the other was male. The conversation turned to dancing. Both of them said that they hardly went to any dances in high school. I wondered why and so I asked. They answered that whenever they attended dances in high school that almost everybody was "dirty dancing" or "freak dancing" or "back dancing" or whatever you choose to call it. For those of you readers more mature than I, or perhaps just more innocent, they explained that when everyone went to dances they were basically grinding their private parts up against one or more people.
As I listened to them, part of me really grieved for them. Not because I judge people in the whole "bump and grind" dance scene, but because they had not experienced the joy of dancing the way that I did. They didnt like dancing because it was too much pressure, too much groping, and and too unsafe to them.
You see for me, both yesterday and today (when I dance), dancing is about having a safe way to touch and talk and get to know one another. It is about just goofing off and having fun. And, I felt like my friends missed all this.
Last year I went to a couple of wedding receptions. I tipped back a few screwdrivers like the good friar tuck is known to do on such occasions, and then I took people out and started dancing with them. With one hand on their hip and one hand on their hand I would spin and dip, talk and twirl. I would take the 60something spinster aunt and point our hands out and march across the room, twirl her around and march the other way. And occasionally, on a really slow song, do more of a huggy bear dance and visit about life and love and all the joyful and important stuff. And, to country songs we tried to stumble through a two-step. This may sound corny to some of the under 30 crowd that reads this...but it was fun and joyful for all involved. It was a way to be romantic and affectionate, and maybe even make a move or two on someone you liked. And strangely enough, the good friar's dance card was full that night. Somehow, with all that is happening in our culture and our schools, we miss a lot of the joy of dancing these days I think. But maybe I am just old fashioned.
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6 comments:
Great post Friar. Unfortunately, I only know how to freak dance...lol. My homegirl and I are starting dance class soon, hopefully I will be able to broaden my dance steps there. :) Great post, very poetic as usual.
I know exactly what you are talking about and I hate it!!! It is why I rarely go clubbing anymore. I love dancing but I hate having to fend for myself when I'm just trying to have fun.
What a wonderful post, Clint. I didn't like dancing much either because I'm not much of a "bump and grind" type.
I like slow dances where I can hold a person close and enjoy the moment. I tend to step on toes, but hey, I do my best.
Thank you for sharing.
Also, Clint, I sincerely apologize for not being around much. I've been slacking so bad on keeping up with blogs lately...including my own.
One of the reason I like going to "old school music" nights and parties is because you see more actual dancing than just grinding.
Maybe that's why I normally avoid the club. I don't want just any old person grinding up against me. And I can't even drop it like it's look warm, so I'd rather not hit the floor unless it's with someone who's not afraid to do more than just stand behind me or with my homegirls.
Ahhh..this is the one positive thing about the bar scene in L-town. They play all kinds of music. I love to dance or just watch others styles of dancing. It's a way to express yourself, let loose, have fun, and not feel stupid about it! My fave in Liberal is country swing dancing...or as I call it the pretzel. Where they spin you like crazy the entire time. There is one older man (probably in his 60's) that is stinking amazing and I always make him dance with me at least once when I go out. He's incredible. I'm really no good, but when you have a partner like him, it doesn't matter!
I hadn't heard about freak /dirty dancing until I reviewed a book recently about prom night.
I agree that it's a sad loss of innocent fun. Hubby and I went to dancing classes a few years ago, but we weren't very good. Partially because I'm so tiny - and I hated changing partners because there was a very tall man I was afraid to dance with. My eyes were level with his belly button I think
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