Do I enjoy being single or not? That is the question.
Sometimes, like when I am wondering what the heck I am going to do on a Friday night besides goof around and/or work on the computer, then I think it might be a good idea to get married.
Other times, like when I am at my sister's place with babies and baby schedules I think, "There is no way in hell I ever want to get married and have children."
I like having a lot of "me" time, and I like being able to do things on my own time and in my own pace. Having a partner in life just complicates that.
For some of my single friends, they seem pretty clear about wanting to get married and have a family. My friend Amy has, as George Bush would say, a very strategeristic plan for her married life. She has a goal of being married by the end of 2006. That gives her about sixteen months to meet and marry the love of her life. Since her 32nd birthday is in November, I guess that means that preferable she wants to be well on her way to walking down the aisle before her 33rd birthday. Good for her!
Other single friends of mine are pretty sure they want to be single for a while. My buddy Mike spent much of an afternoon at a work social gathering avoiding a woman who was interested in him. He is recently divorced and not ready for anything new right now.
I am somewhere in between.
Of course it is crazy to turn romance into a business plan, but sometimes I weigh singleness and marriage in some sort of mental cost-benefit analysis thing:
Benefits of singleness
More time for friends!
More time for my mission and lifes work (the J-O-B)
Less relational conflict (lets face it marriages and romantic relationships take a lot of working through relational issues and conflict, and that is NO FUN!)
Drawbacks of singleness
lack of companionship
Benefits of marriage
Other forms of physical affection!
The joy of having someone to love and give your life to!
The drawbacks of marriage
It is a pretty final decision! (At least I hope it will be)
Being tied down!
A bad choice is utterly miserable!
Nagging and all that stuff
So what would you add to the equation, and how would you weight each of the costs and benefits?