Secure enough in my masculenity

I lied. I said I was not going to do it, but I did. I watched the movie/musical RENT. With Amy in town hanging out with her theater friends I just could not help myself.

Emory has this friend who works at Ransomed Heart Ministries (of John Eldridge fame). Anyway...they have this little theater room for workshops. And they wanted to watch the musical rent.

You have to know, I would probably label myself a progressive or enlightened redneck. This means that I take the blue-collar, down to earth hick from the sticks label without the anti-intellectual, racist connotations. And in this case, it means I have only seen one musical on film in my life before tonight, and it was Fiddler on the Roof. Which I think is a more masculine musical than most. And I got a good cheap beer out of the ministries' fridge, which also made the trip across town worthwhile in and of itself.

I learned a few things. Like that RENT was based on LA BOHEME for instance. I was told that at the beginning, which helped make the rest of the show make more sense. Not because I know anything about La Boheme, but because I know a little bit about the history and ideas of the era that it was written, which gave the movie much more depth and contour.

Now I have to admit....listening to men sing a long to musicals made me a little uncomfortable. There is something about men singing show tunes that....well pushes me beyond my pick up truck, country music, and pork rinds kind of upbringing. But I took a deep breath and told myself it was a cross cultural learning experience and I was fine. Plus I liked and trusted my tour guides into this experience, which made it even more fun.

For those of you who are not familiar with RENT, the musical is set in a neighborhood full of starving artists and homeless folks in New York City. There is one guy who remains single, a lesbian couple, a gay couple, and a heterosexual couple. And a majority of the characters in the play are HIV positive.

In true bohemian fashion, the highest goods in this movie are romantic ideals: especially romantic love and artistic expression. This also is challenging for me. I can be a somewhat romantic guy at times...but I am much more blue-collar in my philosophy of love as well. Love is about longSUFFERING and commitment in my mind more than it is about living from one feeling and moment to the next. I hope to talk more about my thinking when it is a little clearer in a post further on in my life.

The cool thing about the musical, however, is its discussion of impermanence, and thus the importance of seizing the moment. The idea in RENT, besides they never have money to pay their RENT (and it is an implied injustice that they should have to pay RENT), is that they are NOT OWNERS. This does have an implied communist bent, but it also has much more to say. Nothing is here forever. Each moment exists for itself. We need to seize our moment, lay claim to our story, as much as we can and as best as we can. We need to not take for granted the life that we live, the opportunities that we have, and most importantly the relationships that we share. (The movie is also very much about community).

And for that message this hillbilly theologian from the rural Northwest can endure showtunes and an East Coast radically liberal left wing agenda. And maybe see God's grace and love in it all.